“The 5 Secrets of Marriage from the HEART is a blessing you can bestow on yourself, your partner, and the important couples in your life.  Through the story of Donna and Bob, readers learn a simple but powerful strategy to get through the inevitable rough patches in every relationship.  Read this book, It will make a difference in your life and the lives of those you love.”

-Ken Blanchard  Co-author of The One Minute Manager  and  The One Minute Apology

If you could get hold of some information that would help you create a healthy, enjoyable marriage, wouldn’t you do it?
 
If, in addition, you could do something about our 43% divorce rate for first marriages (60% for second marriages) and the damage inflicted upon the children of those marriages, wouldn’t that also be worth doing?
 
If you knew something that could help stem our divorce epidemic, wouldn’t you want others to know about it?
 
We suppose it’s possible to be blasé or resigned to the impact of divorce on children, but the research is clear enough: it’s deeper and longer lasting than previously thought.  The stakes in terms of the psychological health of a large percentage of our population are very high.
 
We are not ourselves researchers, but we follow the research on marriage closely.  One critical finding (by Howard Markman and Scott Stanley) is that the most significant cause of divorce is the inability to communicate in conflict situations.  They have also identified four key danger signs in conflicts, namely, escalation, invalidation, negative interpretations, and withdrawal/avoidance.  We thought, what if these research findings could be converted to simple, easy-to-understand behaviors that readers could apply to their marriages?
 
As writers, we addressed two questions:  first, which behaviors would be leverage points that would change how couples handle conflicts?  Second, what would be the most reader-friendly way to help readers really get these key behaviors, both intellectually and emotionally, in a way that they could see themselves actually applying them in their marriages?
 
Addressing the second question, we decided that since people like stories, enjoy reading them, and tend to remember them, the most reader-friendly format would be a parable.  The lessons would emerge from a story about how a couple in trouble is able to save and renew their marriage.
 
Regarding the first question, we decided to transform the relevant research into five unspoken requests that couples are continuously making of each other.  These unspoken requests became the five secrets of The 5 Secrets of Marriage from the HEART.  If couples could honor these five unspoken requests, they would have fewer conflicts and those they had would be shorter and less severe.  Plus they would feel more loved and more respected.  Could this make a difference in your marriage?  In at-risk marriages?  Could it enhance any marriage?  It could indeed, we think.
 
So, what are these five secrets that, if applied consistently, will make a significant, positive difference in your intimate partnership?  To help you remember them, they conform to the acronym HEART:

Hear and understand me
Even if you disagree, please don’t make me wrong
Acknowledge the greatness within me
Remember to look for my loving intentions
Tell me the truth with compassion

We hope that friends like you, as well as new acquaintances yet to be made, will read and enjoy The 5 Secrets of Marriage from the HEART. Please help us as well to do more to get the word out.  Would you:

 
- Let us know what you think of the book
- Copy and add this story to your websites and pass it on to others in your network who want to build a marriage on honesty, respect, and joy.  We would especially appreciate it if you would include a cc: to us when you do send this note on to others.
- Write a review or comment on the Amazon.com website
- Let us know of anyone you think we should send a copy of the book to because it will be of interest to people in their networks.
- Purchase The 5 Secrets for your friends & family members for engagement, wedding & anniversary gifts!

Thanks in advance for your help.
 
 
From the heart,
 
 
Jack and Corinne
 
“I love good stories and The 5 Secrets of Marriage from the HEART is a great one.  For anyone who has wondered how to save or renew a marriage or how to help a child’s or friend’s marriage in trouble, this inspiring book provides invaluable guidance, I highly recommend it.”
 
-Jack Canfield  Co-author of Chicken Soul for the Couple’s Soul and Chicken Soup for the Romantic Soul